Girlish giggles taunt me as I plummet to my death, over and over. An upbeat, looping soundtrack - reminiscent of an 80's sitcom theme song - becomes my eternal funeral dirge.

I'm speaking, of course, about a sled race with Yeta, an adorable abominable snow-woman who dresses like a Babushka doll. She's the only thing standing between me and the final piece of heart that'll complete my last heart container.

It's the final piece for a reason, mind you. You see, while I suck at a lot of different game types, I'm not so bad at Zelda - a game where, generally speaking, you play an elf-like warrior that can transform into a wolf and solves lots of puzzles in order to collect items. I was happy to transform into this wolf and solve the puzzles required for all the other heart containers. Indeed, I was a perfectly capable gamer when it came to that game.

But not this game.

Chocobo Racing in FFVII, Blitzball in FFX, Hoverboard racing in Ratchet and Clank, and now ice sledding in Zelda. What's the common thread? They're all minigames which have nothing to do with - and are indeed of a different genre than - the game that the player shelled out hard-earned cash to purchase. Some might think of these games as a nice bonus if they were actually any good, but they almost always suck. And you're always required to play them at least once during the primary course of the game.

Speaking of, during my first time through the Twilight Princess sled game, I got stuck in collision on the bridge - my sled hopelessly vibrating at about 30hz as the awful physics engine pulled me through the wall and pushed me back out again, over and over. I had to save my game and reset because there was no other way out of the predicament. I can't say my subsequent runs through the sled course were any more pleasurable, though I at least eventually got past the point where it was required for advancement through the game.

Fellow game developers, please stop putting these crappy minigames in your otherwise excellent titles - especially if they're not going to utilize any of the skills or items the player acquires during the rest of the game.

I've died over 50 times trying to win this race. The times I don't die I lose, sometimes pitifully, sometimes by a couple of seconds. Eiji Aonuma, the game's director, is surely laughing at me right now , his expression identical to that of Yeta's husband, Yeto: "You hate fun, uh?"

Yes, Aonuma, I hate fun. I hate it A LOT.